What are friends for?

You may well get VERY bored hearing me going on about my friends and friendship in general, in fact you may already pretty well catatonic. Truth be told, I believe friends and friendship
to be, quite simply, the most important things in life. They certainly are in my life, defining and guiding me, helping me to be the best I can be as a human being, but they also remind me that life is not only about taking. Giving features in any conversation about friendship, and sometimes we have to give more, others less, in order to be real friends, friends who care.

It may seem obvious but there is no friendship without caring, in fact no human relationship of whatever hue - if you connect with someone at any level you must care somewhat and in some way. Those of us who go through life removed from emotion - the hard ones, as perhaps they see themselves - in truth have few friends that aren't bought and paid for in one way or another, not necessarily directly financial.

Well I know what MY friends are for: their mission in life is to treat me to lots of lovely lunches, accompanied by gallons of superb wine! And one of these friends invited me to lunch the other day, to a restaurant with which he has a professional relationship as a wine merchant and which boasts a Michelin star. His reason for this kind gesture was to say thank you for my help in making his (and his wife's, of course...!) 25th wedding anniversary trip to Greece a great success. Well, it wasn't really necessary and he knows it, but he is generous and kind, not the sort of person you would want to disappoint by turning down his invitation. So I went along to Clapham old town, ready to suffer for my beliefs...

Make fun, you unbelievers, not sold on eating well; I worked hard for my pleasure as the chef chose the occasion to test his ideas for a new menu, a guinea pig role for which I am temperamentally suited and extremely willing. MY efforts were not in vain, though, as not only was the food spectacular to look at (the pics show this clearly...) but bursting with flavours cleverly interwoven, satisfying but not rich, complex but harmonious. My only gripe, a very slight one at that, was that there was little variation in the texture - I love a bit of crunch here and there - and that only really came into play in the desert, a truly spectacular tarte tatin which I forgot to photograph for you.

To show my true colours as a friend not only did I work my way through the food but forced myself to down agreeable quantities of wine as well, kicking off with a small glass of champagne. The first couple of courses, being fishy, were accompanied by an excellent 1er cru Chablis Forets from Moreau Naudet, complex and mouth filling but with the steely backbone of a 'traditional' Chablis. On this occasion a magnum would have been even better, if not for our health... The Barolo that accompanied our main course was from a modest estate that produces excellent wine in the current style, and our 2009 was no exception despite the difficulties of the vintage. Full but not massive, complex but not excessively so, this went down very well with our gamey main course and drank in a way that would have been inconceivable for old-style Barolo of a similar age. We had a half bottle of sweet wine with the tarte tatin, but I neglected to even note its name, though I remember it as pleasantly mouth-filling but not cloying.

Apparently all good things come to an end, and this lunch certainly did after a double espresso to keep us going for the rest of the day, alas not accompanied by lots of fine cognac - I know, I weep even as I write this - due to further obligations and a need to be able to navigate home successfully, which I duly managed. The warm, humid weather was not, in any case, conducive to significant spirit consumption  if physical effort (i.e any form of movement...) was called for!


Next time your friends tell you how much they care test their mettle: Force them to read this post and then ask them where and when they plan on taking you to lunch to show their appreciation for your true, magnificent friendship. That will sort them out, you'll see, as the good ones take you to their favourite place and order nice things; as this is according to their means even a home event is allowed if it is accompanied by decent wine, good conversation, conviviality and laughter, much laughter, priceless laughter.

I look forward to the day when I can, once again, offer my friends the same warmth and hospitality that they regularly extend to me. And you, dear reader, if you have friends look after them, however you can, as life is a strange old thing - they may not be there tomorrow.

P.S. : I'm finishing this at the home of friends where I've been staying for the weekend, and where good food, great company, laughter and mutual feelings of affection and respect are in evidence.

And their dogs are pretty wonderful too!